Hi Reader, The Importance of Family Position Photo: Depositphotos Read on the Blog Have you ever wondered why you always seem to play the same role in your family, no matter how much you try to change? In the last post I mentioned that your position in your family of origin is important. I don’t mean sibling position, although both Murray Bowen and Edwin Friedman considered this to be an important factor in functioning. However, some think that sibling position as a determinant of functioning...
11 days ago • 3 min read
Hi Reader,This week's post is a reminder that when you get frustrated with people, look at the systems in which they function. It has more to do with it than you think. A Tale of Two Systems Photo: eskaylim via yayimages Read on the Blog In two consecutive days, I had back-to-back experiences with Motor Vehicle and a large bank. Which do you think was worse? It wasn't what I expected. Both experiences were related to my work as the executor of a family member's estate. One task was to...
18 days ago • 3 min read
Hi Reader,This week's post is a reminder to think through how you respond to a given situation to get clear on the forces that influence your actions. When you do this, you're able to show up as your best self more often. Let me know what you think. The Stories We Tell Ourselves Photo: VectorThings Read on the Blog I once went for a long run on a brutally hot morning. The temperature was already 80°. Many organized running events will cancel if the start time temperature is above 80°. A few...
25 days ago • 3 min read
Hi Reader,It's Tuesday! This week's post shares what I learned from someone who knew Edwin Friedman. I hope it's helpful. Edwin Friedman's Six Measures of Effective Leadership Photo: nialowwa Read on the Blog The Center was co-founded by Edwin Friedman, author of Generation to Generation. It is where he shared much of his wisdom before his death in 1996. Friedman believed the most important role of a leader is to be a non-anxious presence. Many attendees have been participating for years,...
about 1 month ago • 6 min read
Hi Reader,Happy Tuesday! If you drive a car, this week's post will likely be familiar. I love to relate everyday occurrences to family systems theory. Enjoy! Sidezoomers, Lineuppers and Surrounding Togetherness Pressure Photo: MichaelFelix Read on the Blog I once listened to a Freakonomics podcast where they discussed the issue of what to do when a highway merges from two lanes to one. As Cynthia Gorney writes in her New York Times article, The Urge to Merge, this situation presents an...
about 1 month ago • 3 min read
Hi Reader, I'm sticking with the theme of getting better in 2025. Today's post is a sequel to last week. Let me know what you think. Willpower Revisited Photo: Olivier-Le-Moal Read on the Blog If you haven’t read my last post, The Myth of Self-Discipline, you might want to do so. This post is in response to feedback I received. Rev. Bud Brown emailed to challenge the idea that willpower is a limited resource. He noted that a meta-analysis of all studies since the original chocolate...
about 2 months ago • 4 min read
Hi Reader, For most of my life, I felt like I was undisciplined and lacked willpower. Then, I realized it was more about how I applied the willpower I have. I hope this post can help you in the same way. Happy New Year! The Myth of Self-Discipline Photo: nenov Read on the Blog “We first make our habits. Then our habits make us.”John Dryden I am undisciplined. I’ve known this all my life but have tried to ignore it. When I compare myself to John Wesley, the founder of Methodism, I feel like...
about 2 months ago • 5 min read
Hi Reader, It's Christmas Eve and I figure most people won't be reading emails. If you celebrate Christmas, then Merry Christmas! So, no content this week. Just two recommendations. I'll be back next week with something to help you get a great start to 2025. Also, I apologize to those of you who received an incorrect email about an old Positive Intelligence offering. I AM doing one more program at 2024 prices, before my costs go up. The 7-week program begins January 3, 2025 and Pod (cohort)...
2 months ago • 1 min read
Hi Reader, This is a bit last minute, but I found out recently that Positive Intelligence will be raising my fees as a coach in 2025. The good news is, I'm able to do one more offering of the 7-week program at current prices beginning January 3, 2025. After that, I will increase the price of future offerings. You can CLICK HERE for more details, but if you want to sign up, don't use the link on the webpage or you'll pay too much. My agreement with Positive Intelligence doesn't permit me to...
2 months ago • 3 min read